Thursday, January 22, 2009

Today, I am thankful...

for so many things.

I am thankful for this day off work and time to spend with my growing daughter. I can't believe how big she is and how fast the time is going. Just last night, Chris and I were talking about how the time is flying before our eyes and how precious this time having her at home truly is. In just 2 1/2 short years, she will be off to school during the day and we will wonder where the "early years" went. Call us sentimental, but we really do try to remind ourselves everyday that this time, this day, is fragile and won't come again. I never want to wish it away with "I can't wait until" or "If only she would". We know how lucky we are to have such a sweet, creative, thoughtful, and loving, little girl like our Ella, and getting to spend the whole day with her is a blessing and a joy.

Just this morning, we went to Kroger- one we had never been to before- and they had the child carts- something Ella had never seen. What fun it was watching her pretend to be a mommy and push that little cart around and discuss things with me as she chose items off the shelves. She kept almost running into things (and people), but she would say, "Oh, excuse me!" and just keep going. She had the sweetest, proudest smile on her face and I couldn't help but just love watching her! It once again hit me what a huge, important job I have to teach her about the world and help mold her into someone who is caring, polite, and kind to others. I'm slightly overwhelmed that God has trusted me with so much responsibility and I pray for strength and guidance to live up to the task.

Secondly, I am thankful for this new life growing inside me- this little boy who kicks and rolls and flips at all hours of the day. Perhaps more so this second time around, I am constantly awed by the knowledge that what I'm feeling inside is our son, an entirely new yet complete person, with distinct characteristics and a personality all his own. I wonder what color his eyes will be and will he have his Daddy's smile. Will he have wild, wavy hair like his sister and a fiesty temper to match. Will he like fast cars and skateboards like his cousin Payton, or will he be wild for tractors like his cousin Carson. I learned with Ella to have no particular assumptions, because nothing has ever been as I expected. That's the beauty of it. I have been surprised at every corner by the reality of who Ella is and that has been far greater and much sweeter than anything I could ever have imagined. I know it will be no less wonderful with this child. I feel extremely blessed to have been given this gift, this opportunity to bring another child into this world. What a miracle life is and what a good and generous God we serve!

3 comments:

The Utz Family said...

I find myself thinking alot of the same things. Especially since we know now that Hannah will be our only child it makes me want to slow things down even more. We do need to count our blessings! Hannah is our little gift from God and I know she is here for a reason!:)

The McAfee Pack said...

i also find myself thinking the same thing! tonight we were all four sitting on the couch reading a book before bed and i started to tear up! i thought i just want this moment to last forver!! i always want to remember those moments when i just think how much i love being a mommy! and i agree...it is little hard to swallow the big job that we have!

The Utley Crew said...

I 100% agree! I know it sounds cheesy, but we constantly talk about that, too. Sometimes I wish we could just freeze time, even though I know I will love and be excited about all that lies ahead for them/us, too. This time that they are little and innocent is just so precious. I just want to keep them safe and with me forever! (if only..(sigh)

And, I can't wait for that little man to arrive. Everything with Ella has been so amazing, just wait until all of those emotions are doubled. It's amazing. To hear Abby laugh for the first time was heaven, but to hear the girls laughing together, at one another was just the most beautiful thing ever! When I was pregnant with Olivia, I was thrilled, excited, knew how blessed I was, but would often wonder, how on Earth will I be able to love this new baby just as much, etc. But once they are here, it's as if they were always there. All the joy, fun, love, laughter, appreciation, etc. just multiplies. I can't wait for you, Chris and Ella to experience that.